My hair is still standing on end, like a bad beehive that’s half fallen down. Trying to smile for the photo, it just looks like a grimace. Well that’s probably nothing to do with my hair. Just my resting bitch face’s unfortunate inability to Turn that Frown Upside Down. That and the fact that I was at the end of a three month holiday with my husband, and the whole 24/7 thing was wearing thin.
Denver Colorado, the last leg of our American road trip adventure. Denver itself wasn’t on our wish list, it just happened to be where the airport was, to start the long journey home. The attraction had been the Rocky Mountains. Driving through the mountains, staying at snow covered, quirky old mining towns, seeing moose by the roadside, walking some trails and getting amongst nature had been exhilarating. But Denver just seemed to do us in. The contrast between the ease of the wilderness and the tension of the city was stark and palpable. The only thing Harry wants to see is Mile High Stadium, which we happened to drive past by accident already. That’ll do.
It was the static electricity! Everything I touched, I got a short sharp jolt. Worst was in bed. Every movement I made under the sheet, on that warm night saw blue sparks fly across the bed.
“Aargghh,” I’d scream out, as I’m zapped again and again.
Harry was getting progressively annoyed at my outcries waking him up, and I was getting progressively annoyed at being shocked, and at his indifference.
I call down to reception, thinking there was something wrong with the room, some electrical fault or, I dunno, something. They act as if I’m mad and don’t offer any help.
Finally, someone arrives with a machine that takes the static from the air, or maybe adds moisture to the air, I don’t know how it worked, I was getting close to hysterical with shocks and insomnia, I wasn’t going to read the manual. So they did know what I was talking about all along, it must be a common thing if they have this machine.
Soon the blue sparks and my own personal lightning storm ceased. I was able to get some sleep, but my hair was there to remind me in the morning of my ordeal.
Flying out, I long to see more of the majestic Rocky Mountains and their characterful towns like Boulder and Silverton. I give a one fingered wave to Denver “Goodbye arsehole torture town, I never want to see you again.”
Interested in learning more about static electricity? The Brittanica has you; https://www.britannica.com/science/static-electricity
Want more MAC travel stories? Check out our Travelarium, here; https://mountainashchapter.com.au/?cat=7